View source for 2040 Election Platform

[[President Jaguar]] rose to power in 2040 on a universally beloved platform full of promises that he did not keep.

== False Promises ==

* Throw all of the police in jail.
* Tax the churches to subsidize the liquor stores.
* No more witch burnings.
* Raise the national speed limit to 75. Minimum
* Drinking age lowered to 12
* Re-institute the draft. For NASA.
* Mandate steroid usage for professional sports.
* An NFL franchise for robots
* Minimum SAT scores for collegiate sports.
* Cocaine to be added to the water supply
* Abolish daylight savings time. Entire nation to use Pacific Standard time.
* Flouride to be removed from the water supply and added to the Kale supply
* No more houses. Only cabins.
* Outlaw the following colors: Green. Dark Green.
* No more Tuesdays. 2 day weeks, Friday and Saturday.
* Halloween to be a month.
* Chess sets to feature 8 kings and 8 queens per side. No more pawns or bishops.
* Death Star to become national priority.
* National healthcare for dogs.
* The second amendment applies to mech suite.
* Banks now have to pay you overdraft fees
* 20% increase in "all you can eat".
* No more prisons.
* Corporations are now people. Through cloning. The mass of the person is the net worth of the corperation. They fight Kaiju style.
* Pokemon parliament on C-Span
* Homeless people exempt from J-walking laws
* Tax the libraries to subsidize plastic surgery.
* lightsabers in the classrooms
* Outlaw all Laws.